Cheerfulness is a resource – let’s use it!

encouragement

“… cheerfulness is a resource – you can make it, manage it, and put it into action.”

quote from professor and author Timothy Hampton

I love the above quote about cheerfulness.

Why?

Joy is often a fleeting experience.

Happiness can be elusive.

But cheerfulness is another thing… it is possible to be in a really tough situation, and still manage your emotions to be cheerful yourself and bring cheer to others.

Hi there – it’s Lori – and I’d like to share my latest project: handmade tags I’ve named “Cheerful Tags” and my goal over 100 days is to make at least 100 of them.

Put cheerfulness into action!

Life doesn’t always go the way we want.

Sometimes life is hard.

What can we all do?

Consider the amazing Andrea Bocelli and how, even without sight, he uses the God-given gift of his voice as a resource to bring cheer…

“When I get on stage, my first goal is not to show my expertise, but on the contrary, to give a bit of happiness, of joy, of cheerfulness. I am firmly convinced that in order to sing well, you must love your neighbor and be passionate about life.”

Andrea Bocelli

Hmmmmm – I may not be able to sing in a way that brings cheer or joy – but I can make things from paper!

So to spread a little cheer, I’ve been posting pictures of my “cheerful tags” on social media – and it seems they’re being enjoyed.

But now I need to do something with these “cheerful tags”. I’m blessed right now to have a room to make things in, but I have a feeling I can’t display all 100 of them in there.

So how can they become a resource for cheer?

Sending some cheer and then doubling it!

I want to mail them to people!

But wait… there’s more!

Because I’ve handmade them, they’re designed for the first recipient to repurpose the tag and (if they want) send it to someone else!

Repurpose – Reuse – ReGift — whatever you’d call it!

And here’s your opportunity to have me send you some cheer:

(or at least a cheerful tag)

I have 100 – USA postal stamps – and 100 days to make all the cheerful tags – I started on March 18th and will finish on May 28th 2024.

Would you like a bit of cheer? I invite you to fill in this Google form – here’s the link: https://forms.gle/8uUHm2VeKQ2sn2ceA

How can you get one of these cheerful tags?

• you live in the USA
• you fill in this Google form
• and if you’re reading this and it’s between April 2nd and May 28th 2024, you’ll have the opportunity to receive one of these unique, handmade “Cheerful Tags” from me! (until all 100 are mailed and my stamps are gone).

Receiving a cheerful tag has no cost to you.

And if you want to – (though it’s not required) – you can detach and keep the little note I’ve written on the tag, and then send the tag along to someone else! Now you’ll have a resource to bring cheer to another special person.

Charles Spurgeon wrote,

I think that is a better thing than thanksgiving: thanks-living. How is this to be done? By a general cheerfulness of manner, by an obedience to the command of Him by whose mercy we live, by a perpetual, constant delighting of ourselves in the Lord, and by a submission of our desires to His will.

Chat about happy things.

encouragement

Let’s take a moment and chat about happy things – it might take a bit of effort, but it’s a worthwhile habit to grow…

I’m re-reading a book called “Atomic Habits” by James Clear on how to use small habits to make good changes in life. Simple things, like removing the friction between a good habit and the action you take to do it.

For example, I need to move more for my health, so I’ve paired my favorite morning habit of enjoying a cup of coffee with a gentle stretching routine using an online video app. See, it’s nothing radical. And it’s fitting in quite well because it’s now part of a habit I already have!

What’s another important habit to cultivate?

Make it a habit to chat about happy things.

Positivity isn’t something radical either – no more than moving for your health. It’s brain health.

And yes, positive thinking is not enough, we also need the ability to work with effective focus, to be consistent, to have patience, and wait for the right moment and then follow through…

However, all of the above is more likely with a positive attitude. An optimistic mindset.

So – how could you begin a habit of cultivating a positive attitude and an optimistic mindset?

Pair your time with others – use the habit of good questions.

I’m a fan of asking good questions. It’s something I’m determined to get better at… and I want to share a few good questions (instead of the tried and tired) from someone online – (I love his biz title “Finding Good”) :

1 – “What was the most interesting part of your day today?”

2 – “What’s the best part of your job?”

3 – “What are you most proud of… “ The author of this question suggests this is a good question to use when others are going through a hard time. He says this is a good question to ask: “In all this that you’re going through, what are you most proud of that you’re doing…?“

And as a bonus, when someone says that everything is crap – there’s nothing good to chat about, then ask: “What’s the least crappy thing that happened today?” That question made me chuckle. (Least crappy – the idea is that the term makes us prioritize.)

Your time chatting can improve your mindset and others too!

Whether you’re in a family setting, at work, or in a ministry opportunity – lead (or redirect) the conversation toward optimism through questions. Good questions.

Need more ideas on questions? (not all of these are what I’d call “good questions” but you can pick and choose from ideas using this app.

In an often-experienced synergy, Rob and I chatted just this morning about the idea of good questions! We were talking about the books we’re reading – I shared a little from my Atomic Habits books and then he shared his current book. Rob is re-reading a book about Alexander the Great, who was educated from the age of 12-16 by Aristotle, the Greek philosopher. Aristotle suggested that another facet of good questions was the way in which they’re asked – the tone, the pause, the phrasing etc. Hmmm – lots to think about in that, right?

If you’d like more images, including the one in the title about tea – you can click HERE – to find a fun page of “Tea Quotes”. Enjoy!

Stay focused, be positive, do the work.

encouragement

Stay focused, be positive, do the work.

You may or may not realize, but I have some issues with procrastination… can you relate? Even a little?

A long while ago, when I was writing about encouraging your spouse, I even wrote a book about procrastination in marriage. It was a way to finally answer my husband and adult children’s question, “So how is your book coming along?”

Yes, I finally overcame my procrastination and finished and published that book.

During the research for my book, I dove into what causes people to procrastinate and came up with 9 reasons:

• we fear failure – or success
• we don’t know where to start or how to finish,
• we’re bored,
• we’re striving for perfection,
• we’re saving our energy for something else (otherwise known as laziness),
• we’re too tired,
• we’re rebelling,
• we don’t have the motivation to keep going,
• and we’re distracted by a million other things.

Of course, I worked those reasons into why couples procrastinate in making their marriage more – better – and often avoid encouraging their spouse.

And sure, this information on procrastination can be translated into all our lives. Not just marriage.

*As you’re reading the rest, please note that this post is a “flashback” – I began writing it at the beginning of February 2023 – and updated it this week. Yes. that’s relevant.

In fact, as I write this I’m procrastinating working on a big (at least to me) project coming up at the end of February 2023. I’m supposed to be creating something for that, but instead, I’m writing to you – about how to stay focused, be positive, and do the work. Yes, one of my goals is to write an article every week. And create an image that might be useful to those reading.

But I really should be working on that other thing… instead of the random tasks I’m doing.

What’s stopping me – well, I got caught up… played around with some AI tools for creating images and headlines, but it’s not going to address my “big rock” task. Then I went onto another image creator I use for my crafting and did a little bit of searching for something to use as an image for this article. That isn’t getting my first and greatest task done either. And we won’t discuss how many videos I’ve been watching. Nope. Not going to touch on that topic! Also, I may have initiated and responded to a few texts…

Those things, including writing this first draft (you’ll be reading the final article – I usually do about three drafts) are just me avoiding my big project because I’m a little bit scared of failing as it’s the first time I’m doing this new thing. (Don’t worry, I’ll eventually tell you about it in March. *UPDATE – link is below!

What really needs to happen? How do I stop procrastinating?

I need to:

Stay focused, be positive, and do the work!

It’s not a complicated formula.

Not really.

Well, self-discipline is key.

I’ve actually decided that I’m not going to bed today until I’ve finished the second of four parts of this big project. And I have all I need to do it – I just need to DO the work!

So, I’m giving us both a pep talk!

Is there something in your life you’ve been procrastinating on “doing”?

• maybe it’s addressing a health issue – reaching for a recovery?
• have you left something undone that really needs to be finished?
• could you revisit your goals and map out a step-by-step plan to get there?

Whatever it is… let’s both make a dent in what we really need to do! Those things which will make a big difference – in our lives, and in others’ lives need to get done.

Now is a good time to do it.

Really.

Ready…

Set…

GO!

UPDATE: I began writing this article as I was procrastinating (I guess you “got” that, right?) Well, I did finish. I was invited to share on the topic of “But GOD” at an event with ladies in one of our churches in Florida… and I did it! If you’re interested, here’s the presentation – and included is a picture of me at the conference – to document that I actually did it! LOL

If you want to download these little circles with optimistic statements – for free – click here!

Wait for answers to hard questions.

encouragement

How long do we wait for answers to hard questions?

Maybe the hard questions are more important than the answers they’ll bring. Maybe?

I’m not talking about answers to routine questions like:

• how many feet are in a yard?
• is there an easy way to… ?
• where is… ?
• who can… ?
• when did… ?

Nope.

I’m referring to those questions which don’t appear to have answers.

At least right now.

Do unanswered questions make you uncomfortable?

For me, there are unanswered questions that cause what Rob and I call a “brain itch”. But they’re usually the questions that good ‘ole Google can answer.

It might be when we’re reading and come across a new word – Rob will ask me if I know what that word means, and if I can’t answer him, I must… must… MUST look it up. Can’t sleep unless I know.

Sure.

I’m guessing we all have discomfort when we don’t have answers to the easy questions.

But.

How about the hard questions?

How much discomfort

does a hard question

generate…?

How long do we wait for answers to hard questions?

Yes.

Those questions with no apparent answer… or at least, no good answer – how long do we “stew” over those questions?

Could there be a better way of dealing with the un-answerable questions?

(in comparison to stewing, agonizing, dwelling, etc. etc. etc. ?)

What to do with hard questions?

Wait for answers to hard questions.

I came across this quote by the poet/writer Rainer Maria Rilke,

and it hit me so hard that I had to handwrite it in my commonplace journal:

Be patient
toward all that is unsolved in your heart
and try to love the questions themselves,
like locked rooms
and like books
that are now written in a very foreign tongue.

Do not now seek the answers,
which cannot be given you
because you would not be able to live them.

And the point is, to live everything.

Live the questions now.
Perhaps you will then gradually,
without noticing it,
live along some distant day
into the answer.”

~ Rainer Maria Rilke

from his book “Letters to a young Poet”
ps – formatting is mine

But why this preoccupation with questions?

Why am I noticing and even writing about these unanswered hard questions?

Be patient with hard questions while you wait.

I have some hard questions in my life.

And I’m guessing you do too.

We all do.

Our hard questions may not have obvious answers – or at least answers that would bring us peace right now.

In fact, I believe there are answers to questions that we won’t be able to comprehend for years, decades, and maybe even for the rest of our lives. We might not have an answer to those hard questions until we reach eternity.

So.

What do we do with those hard questions?

We can live with the questions while waiting for the answers…

(not agonize, or fret, or worry, struggle, lament over, wrestle… )

rather…

Love those questions.

Love? Yes. Lovingly live alongside those hard questions as we grow…

Live alongside the hard questions.

Yes.

Some patience with ourselves and those questions.

Not every question has an easy answer.

Perhaps it’ll take time to realize what it all really means.

Be kind to yourself.

Maybe we all need time to grow

ready

for those answers to hard questions…

Download your own copy of this poem – click HERE

Here’s another article if you want to read more… Beautiful Destinations

And a Scripture verse that I feel is relevant…

…suffering produces perseverance;

perseverance, character;

and character, hope.

Romans 5:3,4

Change your mind?

encouragement

Have you changed your mind – how is that OK?

Yes, we’ve changed our minds—many, many, many times.

What we loved to do,

see,

eat,

buy

or even experience

one month ago, ten or twenty years ago…

might be different today.

Gasp!

Is it OK to change your mind?

I’d say “yes” – but then I’m the kind of person who embraces change as an opportunity. Usually. I reserve the right to change my mind in certain cases, about certain things.

When I’m with our little granddaughter, she delights in the colors purple and pink. Will she change her 3-year-old mind about her favorite colors? Probably. And that’s OK.

What about people? Do we change our minds about who we like or don’t like – who we appreciate and don’t appreciate – who we’re concerned over or who we trust? Maybe.

Maybe we should change our minds.

Sometimes we grow in understanding.

Growth in understanding changes our minds.

Over 35 years ago I’d locked my keys in the car, in the Canadian winter, with my 6-month-old daughter in a stroller in a deserted downtown area that wasn’t known to be a safe place. The car was still running with the keys in the ignition. No cell phones then.

A heavily tattooed man with shaggy hair and rugged, not-too-clean clothes approached me. No one else was around and I was apprehensive… I’d been brought up, warned even, to keep myself away from people who appeared like that man.

But you know what?

My understanding shifted when that man went out of his way.

He trudged through the snow and slush to a nearby bar, brought back a metal clothes hanger, bent it straight, shoved it down between the window and the door… and unlocked my car.

That man, with his tattooed face and hands, pierced eye-brow and gauged earlobe, had compassion on a stupid young woman, responsible for a baby. He saw a need and helped me.

And his actions changed me. I grew up a little, right then.

However, maybe I needed to go onward with that lesson… I’m still learning and growing. Changing my mind. A further lesson changed my mind – click here to read – this experience happened in Fort Myers when we were living in our RV. I wonder how the public library there faired after hurricane Ian? Hmmm.

Growth brings change.

Do you have any experiences that changed your mind? How was it OK?

(Even if it wasn’t a good change. I have those too.)

Leave a comment and tell a bit of your story – maybe it’ll change our minds too…

PS – not every change is good. Some are brutal. Others we would never, ever choose. Some changes shift our minds and hearts in ways that are not healthy or sustaining. There are changes that push us into despair. NOW is the time to reach out to someone if you feel your heart and mind dwelling on a change that is too heavy to bear. Now. Call someone. Dial “988” in the United States – here’s the website: https://988lifeline.org/ You are not alone in this. There is a “next” after this change and it may be OK, somehow. Talk with someone now.

You can download the image in the picture above by clicking HERE.

and if you’re interested, there’s a short video of me making this tag – it’s part of a #50stackchallenge with other junk-journalers – click here to go to YouTube!

We all can shine.

encouragement

Rob likes to eat diced apples on his morning oatmeal, so we always have a group of apples on the counter. I looked at them as put them in the bowl, thinking about how they all shine beautifully. Sure, they’re not perfect; one has a brown spot on one side, the other is slightly misshapen, and a few had other issues… However. Each one has value. Rob will enjoy each one on his oatmeal because they all have goodness to share.

It’s the same with people – we all can shine.

There’s no need to let flaws or comparisons blind us to the good in others. We’re all less than perfect. It’s all about what we notice in each other.

• What’s true, admirable, and lovely about her or him?
• There must be something we can praise about that person beside us!
• Look for what’s honorable, and worthy of respect…

Today, take some time to notice everyone around you and find one thing you admire – one thing you’re thankful for… You can do it – just make the effort to look for the good rather than criticize. (Maybe you need to get to know someone a little bit better to see their good sides? Here are a few questions to ask!)

We all can shine – every one of us!

Notice what “shines” about others!

Want to look for what’s good in others (and yourself)? There’s a link below to print out your own reminders.

Cut those reminders out. Tuck them into an envelope, your purse, a book or pocket, or tape one to a mirror. You can also watch a VIDEO of me making a tag and an envelope to hold all the reminders. I invite you to play with paper too! (links to the free download are below the image)

I find the direction given in Philippians 4:8 sums up being optimistic in life.

Just consider if we focus on what is true, honorable and worthy of respect, right and confirmed by God’s word, pure and wholesome, lovely and bringing peace, admirable and of good repute; if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, and then think continually on these things, centering our minds on them, and implanting them in our hearts, we will find so much for which to be thankful! Positive Thanks Living in action!

To download the free images, click HERE.

If you need a template to make a 4×3 envelope – click HERE

Remember to think before you speak.

encouragement

Today, remember to think before you speak… be kind.

Be gentle.

Let your words build up and encourage.

Someone might really need that today…

~ knowledge is knowing what to say

wisdom is knowing whether to say it or not…

What words do you use to be kind? To encourage? To build up?

If you need some ideas of positive, and encouraging words… keep reading!

Over the next 100 days, I’m going to be practicing hand-lettering. (That’s the modern equivalent of calligraphy.) And each word I’m practicing will be a positive and encouraging word…

It’s to join in on The 100-day Project – The idea is simple: choose a creative project, do it every day for 100 days, and share your process online. Every year, thousands of people all around the world commit to 100 days of creating.

I’ll be using a list of 100 words.

Leave a comment with a word you like – a word that builds you up, one that encourages you and makes you smile… I’d like to add it to my list!

You can see the list I’ll be starting with by clicking here.

And more food for thought…

~ before you speak… listen.

before you write… think.

before you criticize… wait.

before you pray… forgive.

~ William Arthur Ward

Remember to think before you speak …

Leave a comment with a positive word…. one (or more) deliberate word that would encourage someone, or show kindness…

Positive Words – Share them!

encouragement

I’m writing Christmas cards these days and also doing a series of collaging exercises. How do these two things intersect? Well, they’re all about positive words. Words that are encouraging and lovely, and true and honorable and…

Positive words – is your language, the words that come out of your mouth (or pen) optimistic?

Sure, we all need to talk about the serious stuff in our life. We need to explore solutions to problems and deal with where we’ve failed and what isn’t working in our lives. Yes. Those words will hold some deeply troubling statements of concern, and even self-reflective non-positive words and ideas. Please hear me: I’m not suggesting you overlook or avoid using words that cause angst for a good end purpose. Don’t ignore the bad. Fix it. Or find a way to (at least) make it into the best it could be, all things considered…

And yet, let’s not forget to also use positive words in our conversation about ourselves, our life, and even our really negative situations. As bad as it gets, there is the option to find words to frame at least some part of ourselves and our life and those around us in a good light…

What are some positive words?

When Rob and I talk to couples about cheap date night ideas, one of the favorite ideas is to go to a card shop and choose cards to read to each other. Financially you might not be able to purchase cards, but you can take a field trip to look through the cards and share the positive statements in them. And laugh at the funny ones.

Those greeting cards will (mostly) hold positive words… just like the Christmas cards I’m writing. Hope. Peace. Blessings. Joy… and more.

What are your favorite positive words?

Which ones do you use most often? Here are 100 of mine:

1. thankful
2. hopeful
3. blissful
4. persistent
5. merry
6. cheerful
7. encouraged
8. assured
9. optimistic
10. comforted
11. enchanting
12. contented
13. pleased
14. grateful
15. expectant
16. happy
17. cherished
18. courageous
19. promising
20. useful
21. glad
22. joyful
23. zippy
24. contented
25. enthusiastic
26. gratified
27. grateful
28. gentle
29. serene
30. glad
31. sympathetic
32. mellow
33. amenable
34. galvanized
35. endorsed
36. loved
37. refreshed
38. favorable
39. enthusiastic
40. willing
41. responsive
42. thanksliving
43. useful
44. boosted
45. respected
46. bright
47. affirmed
48. enlivened
49. spurred
50. promoted
51. positive
52. aided
53. fostered
54. fortified
55. commended
56. helped
57. advocated
58. playful
59. upheld
60. befriended
61. jolly
62. sparkling
63. chuffed (this is one I’ve learned from my junk-journaling cohort from the UK)
64. reassured
65. blessed
66. light-hearted
67. worthwhile
68. applauded
69. reassured
70. delightful
71. beloved
72. caring
73. beneficial
74. supported
75. pleasant
76. sweet
77. heartened
78. profitable
79. lighthearted
80. excited
81. revered
82. enthusiastic
83. tickled
84. exhilarated
85. treasured
86. responsive
87. vibrant
88. well-disposed
89. endearing
90. valued
91. admired
92. well-pleased
93. restored
94. strengthened
95. passionate
96. loved
97. included
98. helped
99. resilient
100. precious
101. What word have I missed that you’d include?

Want to feel good?

Or at least begin to put some happy thoughts into your head… and share with others?

Here are two options:

A. Choose five of the words above, and think of a person in your life who reminds you of that particular word, or an instance where you felt that way… Then write a note to thank that person. (By-the-way, even if that person has passed, or you don’t have their address, still write the note, because expressing it on paper has power.)

B. Choose five of the words above and write five notes to special people who you’d wish that for… “Dear _____, my wish for you is that you feel… “)

To you – the person reading this post:

I’m thankful for you –

you are valued,

and my wish for you is to have all those positive words show up in your life

in special ways that demonstrate how very much you’re loved.

love,

Lori

Throughout December I’ve been practicing collaging using a list of prompts. For today I used the prompt “add handwriting”, so here’s a video on what I did:

(click if you can’t see the player and this will take you to YouTube)

And if you’d like to download that image of all the positive words on a page you can click HERE.

Do what counts.

encouragement

Don’t count what you do – DO what counts!

Being busy isn’t all it’s cracked up to be… Sure. There might be many checkmarks on your “to-do” lists. And you may be tired when you climb into your bed.

But will being busy make a dent in what really counts?

What counts in your life?

When our children were small I’d call my laundry bin “Mount Never Rest“. Much later in life, I definitely missed having a washer and dryer handy when we were in our RV. But all these years of doing laundry only gave me (and those I love) clean clothes to wear for a day. At the end of every day for the last 45-ish years, there were – and are – dirty clothes in that laundry hamper…

Now, I’m probably odd. I don’t mind doing laundry. In fact, it’s the one task around the house I enjoy. (Weird. I know.) So I do the laundry and Rob puts those clean clothes back in the closet. Bada-boom. Bada-bing.

Until next week.

As I ponder, I’m thinking there’s every chance that “laundry-queen” will not be on my obituary. At least I hope not. Even though I enjoy laundry, and my family has appreciated being the recipient of clean clothes, it’s not something I want to be remembered for…

Why? Because it’s just a checkmark on a list of things to do…

Laundry may be necessary, but it’s not what really counts.

DO what counts.

Have you determined what really counts in your life? (Everyone will be different, you know.)

Regardless. Now is the time to focus on what really counts. For the long-term. For your obituary. For what will you be remembered?

Have a little courage… and do that.

Sure, if it’s an important checklist item, get it done. (LOL – My husband just asked me if I could wash his jeans. Like, literally, as I’m writing this! I guess I’m doing laundry again. And that’s OK. I will. Happily.)

But that’s not the only thing I’ll do today…

How about you?

What’s on your list today that’ll contribute in ways no-one else can? Make that your priority. Have courage – because what you do matters.

• Maybe start by saying “thank you” to someone…
• Perhaps choose something from this list, if you’re wondering what really counts.
• Is it possible you need to set some achievable goals? Or just take one small step… ?

Creativity is intelligence having fun.

~ Albert Eistein